Anyway..... facing your fears can be so terrifying. I am desperately afraid of heights as well as losing control. Yet, I was riding in an airplane, buckled to my seat, and rising high into the sky, completely without any control except to look or not look out the window.... and I was calm?
Earlier this year I decided that I was going to travel to some place that I had never been before and do something that I had never done before. Specifically, I wanted to see an ocean, but plans with friends could never be solidified. Finally two friends in DC and Baltimore said that they would host me! Praise God! It took me about 10 times looking at plane tickets online to decide that traveling by plane would be much cheaper. It took about 10 more times to actually press the “purchase ticket” button… Good thing I did it without consulting my parents because I would have been counseled to not go by myself for fear of getting kidnapped.
Once I bought the tickets, I started getting more anxious about how the trip would go. I always have felt sick to my stomach when I try something new, and putting my life on the line (aka falling from mid air if the airplane malfunctioned) AND doing something new was definitely giving me that feeling.
That day leading up to the flight was one of the worst days of my life. I was gagging (from allergies/anxiety), and trying to have a good time as I pushed my mom around on the wheelchair as we attended the Art Prize in Grand Rapids. Mom did her best to distract me, but alas there was no use. Finally an hour before I had to check in, we sat in the car and prayed for the entire trip, because I could not hold back the tears.
Back to the plane. As I sat their, ascending into the sky, I said "I felt calm." You might think that is normal, but I appreciated it tremendously. God can work miracles. He gave an anxiety ridden 24-year-old peace as she "flew" out of her bubble.
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